Quick and Dirty Plot:
We are introduced to all of our major players: the Starks in the North at Winterfell, the Lannisters in King’s Landing and Daenerys (last of the Targaryens) and her brother in a place I misread as Pesto — they’re not there for long so who cares. The king goes to the North to ask patriarch Ned Stark (Sean Bean) to be his right-hand man after his previous right-hand man, Jon Arryn, dies. We later learn that Jon Arryn was likely murdered and the king is in danger.
Meanwhile, Daenerys’s creepy brother marries her off to Khal Drogo (Jason Mamoa) so that Khal and the Dothraki can go back to King’s Landing to take back the Iron Throne for the Targaryens. Back at Winterfell, all the Lannisters join the king, including Queen Cersei (Lena Headey), her son Joffrey, her twin brother Jaime and her other brother Lord Tyrion. While there, Ned’s youngest son, Bran, sees Cersei and her twin brother having sex in a tower, so Jaime pushes Bran out of a window. Also, there was stuff about a Wall, these “Walking Dead” zombie things called White Walkers and Jon Snow (Kit Harington) being a bastard. And that’s what you missed on “Glee.”
I am already struggling to keep people straight. There are so many similar-looking white people that I cannot tell everyone apart. I am making a family tree to keep track. It was recommended to me to only pay attention to the hot people. This has been solid advice.
The one family I can keep track of are the Lannisters. Lord Tyrion is the best. He is snarky and funny and clearly the voice of reason. I was aware of the whole twincest storyline but it was still super bothersome to see it. I cannot bleach my eyes. And as much as I like Lord Tyrion, is he not bothered by his siblings boinking? That also makes me wonder if Joffrey is a product of twincest. I am very angry “Game of Thrones” made my mind go there.
There are WAY too many Starks. Jon Snow is the bastard son of Ned, and his wife is not happy about it. Everyone talks about Jon Snow being a bastard way too much. It is kind of annoying. I am sure he does things other than being a product of adultery. Arya is annoying too. She’s a little kid, I get it, but also like, calm down. Sansa is clearly going to be hella powerful. That girl is already thinking about being queen. She was not eyeing Joffrey because she thought he was cute; she was eyeing him, looking at her future in power. I cannot help but stan a future queen.
I know what happens to Daenerys at the end of the series — I don’t want to talk about it. But I was struck by literally how she does nothing in episode one other than being undressed by her brother (EW), be naked a lot (exploitative) and being raped by her new husband (just appalling). You can tell that men are writing and running this show. I think hearing about these aspects of the show turned me off of watching it. I can say, even now, I am struggling. It is really bothersome to see. I also think knowing the conclusion to Daenerys’s story is making these aspects worse. There will be so much Daenerys goes through — and has gone through before we see her in the series — that to know how many times she will be reduced for men is infuriating. It is also not just Daenerys. I mean, at the Dothraki wedding, there is literally a point during the reception — if that’s what that was — where a woman is assaulted by several men, the men get in a fight, and one of them is killed. The violence against women is staggering since it, so far, has been sexual violence against women.
After one episode, there are some characters and storylines I find interesting. Some of the outside-looking-in criticisms hold up and ring more true in the context of the show.
- Why’d Ned whisper to his sword before killing that guy? Odd.
- Jon Snow saving the direwolf pups. PETA approves.
- Locker room talk as the boys get a shave — gross
- Bran climbs shit: Is something bad going to happen?
- Jaime Lannister looks like the Prince from “Shrek 2.”
- Damn, her brother is creepy.
- S’up, Jason Momoa.
- Jon Snow is a bebe.
- “Have you bled yet?” Awkward! Who says that?
- “There is no word for ‘thank you’ in Dothraki.” LOL
- This cliff scene is uncomfortable.
- Bran is climbing. Bitch, you gonna fall.
- EW. Twincest.
“Game of Thrones” is available to watch on HBO and HBO Max.
Morgan Roberts (she/her) was by films and television. She spent many nights watching “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” or whatever the family rented from Blockbluster. Morgan is particularly interested in cinematography, supporting female filmmakers and “Fleabag.” Outside of a deep love of film, Morgan is passionate about mental health advocacy, gender equality and true crime podcasts. Morgan also contributes to In Their Own League.